My kids are smart and I am proud of it!

If I learned one thing through homeschooling, it was how incredibly smart both of my children are. Having read some of their assignments, I was blown away by their accomplishments.

I for one didn’t use such descriptive language in my writing at their age, and still sometimes struggle to put words together. 😂

Kids are so smart but they don’t always know it! They lack self esteem, confidence and often feel incapable. In today’s world, our children are up against a lot of external competition and no matter how smart they are, they simply struggle to see it!

Their story to themselves looks something like this:

“I got to level 3 on the game but Kevin got to level 4 so Kevin is smarter than me”
“I got 80% in my Maths test but Rebecca got 89% she is so much smarter than me”

Would you agree?

SO, how can you help them?!

First and foremost, in order for your child to understand the emotions related to “feeling smart” they need to feel it. Which brings me to the next question, how do you help them to “feel it”?

“The answer is through YOU”!!

The journey of parenting is about support, guidance and encouragement. To put it another way, you are their coach! It is your role to bring out the best in them. Irrespective of what is happening externally, you have the power to connect with them and make them feel empowered.

“Simple language can make all the difference”!

When I collect my children from school, I greet them with the biggest smile and pre covid, the biggest hug! I am obviously very happy to see them but I make sure that they can feel it through my body language.

They interpret this as “mum gets so happy when she sees me, I am special”.

Kids feel and learn through you as their mirror. Your actions and your language both physical and verbal, creates meaning in their world.

When your child does something new for the first time, acknowledge their achievement, progress, bravery and courage. When your child comes home feeling deflated after a playdate, read their body language and respond to them accordingly. Crack a joke and make them laugh or better still, get them to tell a joke which makes you laugh. Then use that moment to tell them how good they make you feel.

You will notice that your child’s body language will change, their mood will change and their story in their mind will also change.

“Switching or flipping any given situation can encourage your child to see the best in themselves. When they feel it and they see it through your eyes, they will start to believe it”.

It’s the same with us, right?! Think about the time when your colleagues got excited when you walked into the office or when one of them said “thank god you are here, I need your advice”. How did that make you feel? Important, confident, worthy, happy and appreciated?

Our kids are wired the same way. What makes you feel good also makes them feel good. They just need you to show them that they are better than they think they are so they start to believe it.